<-----This garbage can is for Phil. ----->

As a webmaster, I feel that it is my responsibility to go out there and experience some things and report to my readers as to what kind of experience I had. Sometimes it’s my job to warn you all about things you just shouldn’t try. This is one such warning.

Last nite I went to see Collateral Damage with Kent, Andrew, and Phil. We weren’t going in hopes of it to be a great flick – I mean, after all, it got *no stars*. I feel a little bit bad for it, so I thought I’d throw some stars around my referrence that it got none. Poor movie. Anyway, the majority of this movie was like a joke. Here’s a quick synopsis(don’t worry, I won’t spoil the surprise twist ending in which Arnold defeats the bad guy, oops!): Arnold is a firefighter in New York(does this sound familiar at all?) and he goes to pick up his wife and son at some cafe. He talks to some cop that he doesn’t know for a second, just tells him that he’s not parking illegally or something, and then watches as a bomb goes off next to his wife and son, and they die. Arnold is later told what the bomb was planted by the “cop” he talked to moments before it went off. Arnold knows who the bomber looks like and no one else does, hence he goes to Colombia to find him. There were lots of ridiculous things in this movie that weren’t jokes – which made them a million times better. For instance, Arnold goes to a Colombia-terrorism expert guy who knows where to go, who to talk to, etc. The great thing was that he had a freaking terrier coming out of his shirt – the most chest hair any of us had ever seen. We were surrounded by teenagers so everyone was cracking up SO hard in the theater.

This movie was full of ridiculous stuff – Arnold stops a fight between two men and a woman(none of whom he knows, in a country that he doesn’t live in and is trying to keep a low profile) simply by running over to them, holding his arms up and saying “Hey hey hey hey…..::Arnold looks at the two men:: whaat ah-re yu dooing?” in his perfect Schwarzenegger accent. Even the catch phrases were really sub-par for good ol’ Arnold. Are “I’m going to kill you right now!” and “It’s ovah!” up to the Arnold standards that we’re used to? Are these lines going to rival his most famous of all time? I think not.

So this was a really stupid, hilarious(even though it wasn’t supposed to be) flick. Do not go see it if you don’t want to leave the theater laughing for the wrong reasons.