Lifestream
March 10th | |
|---|---|
 | I switch from standup mode to karaoke mode in mere moments. Like Voltron, but with more REO Speedwagon. #cantfightthisfeeling |
March 9th | |
| | Hollywood Improv tonight with Mo Mandel, Theo Von, and Chris D'Elia. 8:30 - just 5 bucks. Be there or put me in your will - your choice. |
March 7th | |
| | Let it be known that I discovered Bruno Mars before any of you. #thatmakesmecoolright |
March 5th | |
| | was singing in the car with the windows down and got a HUGE thumbs up from Richard Kind at a red light. Day: made. http://twitpic.com/16uh3t |
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March 4th | |
| | rocked @ComedyJuiceLA with @dougbenson, @danieltosh, and @boburnham tonight. What an incredible show. Thanks to everyone who came out. |
March 3rd | |
| | Performing on @ComedyJuiceLA tonight with @dougbenson, Neal Brennan, Jeff Dye, and huge surprise guest! http://bit.ly/9hx8hz |
March 2nd | |
| | Just found 5 bucks. Now all I need is a story with no ending. http://twitpic.com/16ax5j |
| | Shared PeetGuercio: http://twitpic.com/16ax5j Just found 5 bucks. Now all I need is a story with no ending..  |
March 1st | |
| | My bedroom eyes are suspiciously similar to my sleeping eyes. |
February 25th | |
| | saw a lady in 90210 with a dog in a baby stroller. With a purse. Because dogs need chapstick and can't walk. http://twitpic.com/15cn0u |
| | Shared 2 photos. |
February 22nd | |
| | UC Irvine campus show is PACKED. Thanks Robbie for having me and thanks to everyone who came out for laughing! |
February 19th | |
| | Camping all weekend in Joshua Tree. Tents, sleeping bags, fighting for survival. Finally know what it's like to live in Canada.#suckitCanada |
February 18th | |
| | Baby carrots + cocktail weenies + shoestring fries + shot glass = I AM A GIANT NOM NOM NOM |
February 14th | |
| | Proof that Larry King is way more racist than John Mayer. http://twitpic.com/139yfe |
| | Shared PeetGuercio: http://twitpic.com/139yfe Proof that Larry King is way more racist than John Mayer..  |
February 13th | |
| | Family Guy + Always Sunny Live Haiti Benefit. Best show ever. http://twitpic.com/12y2q4 |
| | Shared PeetGuercio: http://twitpic.com/12y2q4 Family Guy + Always Sunny Live Haiti Benefit. Best show ever..  |
February 12th | |
| | UPS lady just tried to say "ballpark estimate" but said "ballpoint estimate" and then "rough balls estimate". #gladshestoppedthere |
| | ILastEightNights #effectivejdateusernames |
February 9th | |
| | Wait, what? It's StubHub.com, not .net? All this time, I've been paying convenience fees for amputee porn. |
February 8th | |
| | My new site is launched. Ch-ch-ch-check it. http://is.gd/7X5Rj |
February 5th | |
| | theAUDITION, Valencia, Chali 2na, Billy Talent, Chris Ayer, Mayday Parade. #musicfriday #idontfollowlyourrules |
February 3rd | |
| | My request for www.pe.et was rejected. Not cool, Ethiopian Telecom Corporation. #howawesomewouldthatbe |
February 2nd | |
| | DontMenschionIt #effectivejdateusernames |
| | Hey lady, you dropped this $100 bill. #ivegotcrazyintegrity |
January 30th | |
| | Best Miss America contestant factoid: "Is inspired by Batman (Adam West)". #isweartheysaidthat |
 | Shared Wired Media Room Makeover.  |
January 28th | |
| | If all her Scrabble words are sexual innuendo, she'd rather play Don't Wake Daddy. |
January 22nd | |
 | Shared 20 photos. |
January 21st | |
| | KosherDick #effectivejdateusernames |
January 14th | |
| | I don't trust anyone that doesn't like Cinnamon Toast Crunch. |
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| | Performing on @ComedyJuiceLA Thursday night in Pasadena with Bret Ernst. Email @comedyjuice.com">icehouse@comedyjuice.com for free tickets. Also, jokes. |
January 10th | |
| | Shared 2 videos. |
| | I turned $1 into $2.82. Suck on that, Vegas. The drinks are on me at #ces. |
January 9th | |
| | I was filmed dancing in stereoscopic 3D and displayed on a huge TV for everyone at the Intel booth.Like Avatar, but with a better story.#ces |
January 8th | |
| | Cheesesteaks for breakfast? You're too good to me, Vegas. #ces http://twitpic.com/xa7gl |
| | Shared PeetGuercio: http://twitpic.com/xa7gl Cheesesteaks for breakfast? You're too good to me, Vegas. #ces.  |
January 7th | |
| | In Vegas for #ces with @geoffreyplitt. Bellagio show made 10,000x funnier due to Proud To Be An American blasting. http://twitpic.com/x5aqx |
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January 6th | |
| | Adding ", son." to the end of normal sentences is a great game. "Cardigans are on sale, #son." |
December 31st | |
| | I wanna know who else gets a text message at midnight from someone who isn't in their phone. |
December 22nd | |
| | "Tiger Woods, man... you don't even have to write jokes about this guy. So I haven't. Any couples here tonight?" |
December 21st | |
| | I really prefer this new meat-and-potatoes diet over the rat-poison-and-rats fad of November. Finally, energy with no crash! |
December 18th | |
| | Just got a big holiday bonus. Told my boss I expect seven more checks of equal value. He laughed, I stared intensely. |
| | As it turns out, I *do* have a cover of Michael Bublé singing the Spiderman theme. I've been living a lie all this time. |
December 12th | |
| | Shared PeetGuercio: http://twitpic.com/t66zy 90s hip hop party at the Echoplex. Dance dance daaaaaance.  |
| | 90s hip hop party at the Echoplex. Dance dance daaaaaance http://twitpic.com/t66zy |
